Shamanism

Perhaps not by chance have I had shaman training beginning with Grandmother Parisha back in the '80's. We were at Topsail Beach, North Carolina and I was excited because I wanted to learn about healing in the old ways. We were taught that the word 'medicine' means 'balance'. Move into situations of imbalance and balance them, then move out. We were warned that this work could be dangerous, but we were young and didn't care. What could be dangerous about entering into spirit? Yes, we were young.

Grandmother Parisha is the ultimate teacher of shamanism and I was honored to be with her. I had been with her for many years and had 'danced' her (meaning: tested her teachings) until I was sure she was who I thought she was. When all that was settled, I allowed enough trust to let her in, to teach me.

Shamanism is not something you enter into without a teacher. In Grandmother's case she had much to offer, a lineage of medicine people waiting to assist in an invisible line of wisdom carriers that extends all the way back to the beginning of hu-man. Young and stupid we all were. We went into places she had warned us not to go and then we had to learn how to deal with what was brought back, having attached itself to us. Over the years she would whip us into shape with verbal back-lashings, love, humor and more patience than anyone I've ever met.

The real deal came with the death of a loved one. Car accident. In shock, I enlisted the help of a friend who has extraordinary insight in the spirit world. She did the job but she didn't have the training I had taken for granted. There can be no weakness in the other worlds and this beloved came back broken under pressure. My first big lesson. Don't send someone else to do what I can do and have been trained to do. Never estimate that someone else is better or stronger than you. I've had to learn many things the hard way; by experience. Many people talk a good talk learned from various sources but experience is always the best teacher.

And Grandmother certainly had the experience. She trained us for the things to watch out for and how to act instead of react. Still, there are no guarantees in any of the worlds that you will always get out intact.

So it was up to me. I put aside my grief of having lost Susan and visited myself upon the gates known as 'death doors' to show her the way. I had no idea I could do this until I did it.

All the while I could hear Susan telling me to 'call her mother'.

I did not know Susan's mother well. I'd met her at various occasions. The birthdays of my nephew, maybe three out of the six that he'd had, maybe a Christmas or two. We would exchange pleasantries. I knew I liked her.

But to call her to say I had gone to the spot where Susan had died and led her out of that darkness? Who could believe such a thing.

Susan was relentless. Within three days she was literally nagging me to "call my mother".

I dialed the phone and her mom picked up. I asked how she was and offered my condolences.

We exchanged pleasantries and hung up.

Susan had heard. "CALL MY MOTHER!" I was embarassed that I had let her down. I dialed the phone again.

This time her mother and I connected. My way in was that she loved astrology. We spoke about the stars for awhile and what little knowledge I had of astrology stole my way into Susan's mother's heart. I explained that Susan and I were in touch and that her daughter was ok. It was her daughter that had demanded that I call her. She spoke and her words were of hope and the faint light of healing. "You don't know how much better I feel knowing that her spirit won't be left under a car on the side of the road. It was my worst nightmare. Thank you." How could I have doubted that I could make a difference?

I worked with Susan all that week. On the last night I moved in spirit and saw Susan become a burst of brilliance as her being became a star. No other way to explain it. I called her mother right away. She said, "how remarkable is that! I was just standing on the patio looking out at the stars on this clear and beautiful night and I saw a shooting star and I just knew it was Susan. I am at peace."

This experience strengthened my resolve. I could do this work. Why not? Everyone has a job they're good at. With more experience I may even grow to like it, as sad as it is.

I've worked with others who have gone on to the other side. As yet, none so sad as a 15 year-old who hung himself. How do you shake the spirit of a stupid boy. It was the only time I cried on returning to this world. But one has no time for judgements. There is too much work to do.